why so serious?

i've a week plus left. there isn't any part of me wanting to go back, minus my tummy(haha). but oh well, life comes with a lot of responsibilities, and I've 2 years to go. so I'd say, let's go with it. after all, I get long breaks and get to celebrate raya at home. some others do not have the same opportunities.I guess we're all lucky in different ways.

I just got my baju raya, and that's a living proof that I've expanded. I think I chose the wrong colour. too bright for my liking. let's see if I could shed a few pounds off in a week, or I shall go baju raya hunting the day before the day.

Ramadhan is moving so fast and it saddens me that we're reaching the end of it. I am not really looking forward to the month which comes after.:(

gotta have you

Imperfection

Imperfection is beautiful. I am sure you've heard this. and when I hear one says this, I can't think of anything but my family.

I sometimes wished I had a somewhat normal family, where everyone is well-behaved, and we would all mind our own business. but when I am away, or when I am with my family, I realized I missed this imperfection. my mum's siren,ina and her proper ways, niza's mood swings, boy and his own ways, hanim's baby talks, and yati and her awesomeness.We all are different, and what makes us differ from each other makes us closer. The unspoken bond. We might be one hell of a dysfunctional family. But, what you see is what you get, there's nothing pretentious about us. and it's always noisy when everyone is around, and I think it is too quiet when one goes missing. we have each others back, and would'nt mind going far for another. though I sometimes feel much annoyance towards one, but sometimes,I feel I am overwhelmed by how much love I feel for them.and sometimes I missed them so much even when they're right in front of me. I fear one day this will all go away. and one day this will all belong to my past, and I will long to re-live these days.I'm afraid of the word memory.
imperfection is indeed beautiful, don't you think?

i don't sleep anytime before 2 am.

for the longest time, maybe not too long, I have nothing at all to say. words seemed redundant, and when I do feel like blogging, it's more of a medium to express my anger. oh I certainly had loads few days back,to the point I felt emotionally unstable and I hit the lowest point in my life. I feel way better now and surprisingly calmer. should I blame it on the hormones? I admit, i have terrible mood swings. my mom was the victim, and naturally, I would feel guilty for my own childish actions. she was only forgiving, and treated me as if nothing ever happened once we had one of our fights. i have to learn to control my temper for words can certainly hurt in ways you can imagine.grr,,,woof!

i like to procrastinate. but don't we all? I still have not sent in my GARDA clearance form or change my flight tickets. all should be done a long long time ago, but being the lazy bum that I am hence the delay. the Internet is corrupting my brain as much as it is shattering my priorities. I am being such an anti-social, though this is nothing new, and i feel isolated from the world more than ever.I shall expand until I reach the size of the bed. I can feel it has already started though it's a fasting month.

i don't get dramas as much as I don't get stupidity and superficiality. I wish we could settle for embracing diversity and not have this 'trends and obsessions'. It's just too annoying. why do we have to be such a show-off and why do we try so hard?after all, isn't living life in moderation the best way to live a life?

Happy Ramadhan people!:)