come a bit closer.

i have been 24 for a while now and aged in a way most of us would prefer to, with their loved ones. I had the best set of people and food, what more can one ask for?:)

what did I wish for? it is of course, a secret.let a wish be left as a wish, even if one is not meant to come true.

my days have been filled with ward rounds, and I spend most of my time on the road. I can't imagine myself doing all this before. because the thought of becoming a medical student, or even a doctor never really crossed my mind. this path I choose, as much as it was my mother's choice, was something I can easily choose not to take. because there wasn't any pressure. but I freaked out, and this seemed like the best opportunity to seize and the right thing to do. so I walked down the path, and the road has not been a smooth one. i stumbled, but yet I managed to survive somehow. I don't know whether it's my luck, or I have a secret angel looking over me, but I have made it this far.I'm a 4th year medical student yo!

ok that was totally random.

oh and I am still annoyed with trends and obsessions. why some wouldn't embrace diversity is beyond me. for once be an individual, rather than follow the herd. so what if you're the odd one, at least I can look at you and still see you.

and ok that was a random post number two.

the last two nights I dreamt of him. we were sitting on the pavement and he smiled. in my dreams, it felt like he never left. but I knew I've been missing him, and missed seeing him. He brought this familiar feeling, which always reminded me of home.the same comfort, the same warmth in his eyes.

I know it will never truly heal.

time sure flies.

one thing

I think I am misunderstood. but at the same time I might be the most self-centred and selfish b**** you might come across. wouldn't it be wonderful to be able to read each other's mind?and that I, don't have to spell out everything which defined me and for your emotions to be as naked as it should have been.

I am still 23

time flies. I have noticed.this is the 23 years old me talking, or urm, typing. I'd like to believe in many ways, I have not change. perhaps I'm still the sweet little girl you knew from back then. maybe I still giggle to your silly jokes, have silly crushes, and think of nick carter as one of the most beautiful person on the earth.*blushes* but see,if I tell you this, right now, you'd laugh out straight in my face.of course you know why. we have our age limits for things which are acceptable to us. and as for me, those are among the things which are meant to be packed, sealed and delivered into my box labeled 'memories'. sigh

as for the new year's resolution, so far the only thing I have managed to cross out from the list is eating healthy meals. and attend classes. I am imspired by some and intimidated by others. but that is something which keeps you going, it motivates you to achieve those little things in life and hopefully gets you to stay in line(ceh!)but I know this will not last for long, for the new year is still new. and there are so many temptations coming my way. I deserve a big warm hug from all of yous, say in 300 ++ days from now, you'd meet a new and better me. hopefully yeah. keep those prayers and good wishes coming my wayy. haha

tonight-stars

come around and say you love me
hang your heart in lights above me
is that too much to ask for?
When the night descends upon us
take a shower dry your hair by the furnace
I'll watch you from the corner

Telephones and old typewriters
words of love along the wires
Let's make it work tonight
Telegraphs and birds that fly
through air so still you hear me sigh
Let's make it work tonight
Tonight, tonight

Then furious you threw the picture
eye cap in hand an awful mixture
That kind of hard love is the worst
I try to speak but you don't hear me
when you're gone you still feel near me for a while for a little while

I've tried Telephones and old typewriters words of love along the wires
But nothing is working tonight
I've tried telegraphs and birds that fly through air so still you hear me sigh
But nothing is working tonight
Tonight, please let's make it work tonight
Please let's make it work tonight, tonight

oh, the entry below refers to my love and hate relationship with food. *blushblush* funny how people think I have a secret boyfriend, when I clearly don't. the only secret I've been holding over the weekend was about my suprise trip to manchester this friday. and that too has been told to the one and only.so, no secrets. If I ever do find someone, you'd get the hint. he'd be in every one of my posts(hopefully not,:P). that's the beauty of falling for someone.:)


I miss mama!!:(

I am getting dumber as I age. .

there, I find the untouchable and unreachable irresistible. SIGH.

but at least I have something to write down in my diary and laugh about 10 years from now.:)

the new year post

my 09 resolutions

- to loose 15kgs
- to study harder, and perhaps start taking medicine seriously
- to learn something new
- to eat healthy stuffs.
- to attend classes and not missed the mondays and fridays of my rotations
- to try not to fail any of the rotations.
- to put on a bit of makeup
- to wear colours other than blacks.
- to try to be less critical
- to be nicer, happier
- to be a better person and muslim
- to write something in my diary everyday